If you’re all caught up on this week’ Animal Kingdom (spoilers ahead!), then you know the queen is dead. TNT’s biggest badass matriach, Janine Cody, met her demise after a quick and brutal brush with cancer in season 4 of the Sons of Anarchy meets Oceans 11 California family heist drama. So it’s with great sadness (but ultimately rage-filled vigor) that we present her legacy: The Smurf School For Living Like a Genuine Badass. Donations can be made to sad school, of which she’d likely tell you to “shove it up your ass” if she were still with us.
But first: The David Silver 90210 Master Class to Dancing in Public
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Smurf AK
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Maintain Your Priorities
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Remain Emotionally Unavailable
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Keep It Sassy
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Be Firm, But Fair
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Don't Be Afraid to Shit at Your Friend's House
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Give Constant Horrifying Glares
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Where There's Blood, There's Family
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Make Everyone Incredibly Uncomfortable
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Be Open With House Guests
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Devise Questionable Plans With Friends
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Overshare Whenever Possible (With That Horrifying Glare)
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Don't Hesitate to Slap a Bitch (As Long As It's A Guy)
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Keep It Real at All Times
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Hope For The Best...
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Know It'll All Go to Hell in Time
